How to Flirt With a Handkerchief, 1877

"I hate you"?
George P. A. Healy, Euphemia White Van Rensselaer (1842)
Metropolitan Museum of Art

"The handkerchief, among lovers, is used in a different manner than its legitimate purpose. The most delicate hints can be given without danger of misunderstanding, and in "flirtations" it becomes a most useful instrument... The following rules are the law on the subject:  

Drawing it across the lips                       Desiring an acquaintance
Drawing it across the cheek                  I love you
Drawing it across the forehead            Look, we are watched
Drawing it through the hands               I hate you
Dropping it                                                   We will be friends
Folding it                                                       I wish to speak with you
Letting it rest on the right cheek         Yes
Letting it rest on the left cheek            No
Letting it remain on the eyes                You are so cruel
Opposite corners in both hands          Do wait for me
Over the shoulder                                     Follow me
Placing it over the right ear                   How you have changed
Putting it in the pocket                            No more love at present" 

Daniel R. Shafer, Secrets of Life Unveiled (1877) 

It would be pretty easy to confuse "I hate you" with "Do wait for me," and your lover will be heartbroken if you ever have to blow your nose, but still: the time has come to apply this system to bar napkins.

How to Impress Girls at a Dance, 1530

Fabritio Caroso, Il Ballarino (1581)

"Furthermore never fart when you are dancing; grit your teeth and compel your arse to hold back the fart... Do not have a dripping nose and do not dribble at the mouth. No woman desires a man with rabies. And refrain from spitting before the maidens, because that makes one sick and even revolts the stomach.  If you spit or blow your nose or sneeze, remember to turn your head away after the spasm; and remember not to wipe your nose with your fingers; do it properly with a white handkerchief. Do not eat either leeks or onions because they leave an unpleasant odour in the mouth."

 Antonius Arena, Leges dansandi (1530)

That Antonius Arena. He really understands the enigmatic desires of womankind not to dance with a leeky, slobbering fart-monster. 

How to Blow Your Nose, 1616

Francesco Salviati, "Portrait of a Man,"
Metropolitan Museum of Art

"Blowing the nose. We must not blow our nose too lowde, nor open the hand-chercher at all to shewe any nasty filthinesse, nor lay it to the cuppe where another meanes to drinke..."

 Thomas Gainsford (?), The Rich Cabinet (1616)


Among the smart ideas introduced by the renaissance was the recommendation to not smear your snot on anyone else's drinking glass. Best practices, folks!